1 Simple Method To Conquer Your Fears

December 18th, 2009 by John

What are you afraid of? Are you afraid of flying, people, heights, clowns, prospecting, etc…?  It doesn’t matter what your fears are, the good news is you can conquer your fears!

 

I am going to share one personal story with you of how I learned to conquer my fears at a very early age.

 

My father was involved with a civic group in our community. The civic group used to maintain the community pool. I would go to the pool in the evenings, with my father. While he would do daily maintenance on the pool I would use the time to swim and have the pool to myself.  Those were great summers growing up. Well anyway I became quite good at performing ones and one and a halves off the low boards. I practiced every night, so I could show off to my friends during the day.

 

My dad would watch me and asked one night why I don’t do my dives off of the high dive. I told him I was afraid of the high dive. He asked me, “What are you afraid of”?  I told him it was too high. He asked, “Can you jump off of the high dive”?  I told him I didn’t want to.

 

My dad started to climb the high dive and told me, “Follow me up and I will show you how to do it”.  We get to the top of the high dive and my chest felt tight and my mouth went dry. He talked me out to the end of the board and I remember shaking and trying not to show any fear. He told me to just stand at the end of the board, take some deep breaths and look out at the horizon. I did what he said and began to calm down.  He started talking to me as I was staring out over the pool. He said, “John, this is just another diving board, it is no different than the one down below.” “When you are ready I want you to step off the end of the board.” I told him that I was not ready. He said, “I’m going to count to three and you will step off.” He began to count one; two…and then he pushed me off the end. I hit the water and quickly came to the surface and realized that nothing bad happened to me.

 Dad hollered for me to come up again. I was a little shaken but went up the ladder and out to the end of the board. Dad asked if I was ready to jump again. I told him I was not sure. He told me to go to the end of the board and take another deep breath and relax. He then began to count, one, two, three…I didn’t jump. He then pushed me off the board again.  Once again I came to the surface but this time I felt exhilarated! I quickly went back up the ladder went to the end of the board and jumped! It felt great!

 

On the ride home I thanked Dad for helping me jump off the high dive. He told me, “John you just learned a fear conquering secret.” I was only in second grade so I did not understand what I had learned. So I asked him what I had learned. He told me, “If you are afraid to do something, just do it three times in a row as fast as you can.”  That lesson has stuck with me and I will never forget it.  I have used this technique in everything I was afraid of doing. Let me tell you it works!

 

Within two weeks I was doing my ones and one and a halves from the high dive. I will never forget that summer.

 

What ever your fear may be, Like the Nike commercials, Just Do It! Do it three times in a row as fast as you can.

 

This will apply to almost any fear you have, whether it is public speaking, flying, prospecting, cold calling, heights, and clowns, whatever it is this will work for you!

 

John Stone

What is Your Fear?

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  • John,

    This is a GREAT recipe for eliminating Fear. It's amazing though how we are almost fearless when we are kids, but yet when we get older we start to manufacture more and more fears. Thanks for sharing.

    - Yo
  • Yes Yo,
    Very Interesting point. I never really thought about how we do develop more fears as we get older.

    John
  • Thanks for sharing your Story John,
    Loved it..... 3 times.... it makes total sense. The more we suck it up and just do it, the easier it gets each time :)
  • Cassie,
    Everything gets eaisier the more times you do it. Thanks for reading my post.

    John
  • Awesome blog post John!

    Your right, people are just afraid to mess up, make mistakes and fail. What they are not realizing is what you have explained. Our fears are not really not as frightening as we perceive, we just need to "step off the board" as you did.

    Thanks,
    ~Bert
  • Yes Bert, I have always been a sink or swim person since that day. Thanks for taking a look at my post.
  • billpalte
    Hey John,
    This is the 1st time I have read this process ... but it makes sense. To conquer your fear, you have to have a plan. I really like the simplicity of your method and will begin instituting it immediately.

    Thanks for the great information.

    To Your Continued Success,
    Bill
  • Bill,
    I love when someone can take away some value from my articles.

    John
  • Nathan McClure
    John, the just do it attitude when it comes to marketing is such a powerful tool. You can't be afraid of failing at something the first time you try something new. It is through failure that we learn and hone our sales skills.
  • Nathan,
    Thanks for taking a look at my post Nathan.
  • John,..Great story! Nice to see you here on your blog!
  • Barry,
    Thanks for taking the time to visit.
  • John,

    Sounds like we had the same experience. I went to CA when I was in the 5th grade and was afraid of the deep end of the pool and my uncle pushed me in. I am not the best of swimmers, but I am not afraid to swim now.

    But somewhere along life, I lost that lesson and thank you for reminding me.

    Because of my fear of getting negative comments on my articles, I stopped writing. With the encouragement of my mentor and fellow marketers, I am back to writing and publishing my articles.

    Good message to all, John. Thank you for sharing.
  • Tamara,

    Keep writing and posting. There will always be a negative person out there but they do not survive long in a positive environment. You will have 99% positive comments, don't focus on the 1% that bring you down.
  • bobhoward
    Overcoming fear is something that we have all faced at some time in our lives. When run your own business it is something that will show itself over and over in different ways. Getting past that build the character that it takes to succeed.

    Good Post!
  • Bob,
    Thanks for reading my post. Have a great New year.
  • bobhoward
    The personal growth that one must go through in this business is a very large obstetrical to most. Pushing through that to get to the other side is what builds the character that makes you successful. Fear is just one of those but a significant one to overcome.

    Good Post.
  • John, I had a good chuckle when you talked about your dad pushing you off the high dive, but really, it's the truth. Sometimes you need that little push at the beginning and then it gets easier.

    I think you post covers a lot of ground not only in our business, but in life in general. Quality post John! I hope someone learns from your content here.

    ~Linus
  • Linus,

    Thanks for taking a look at my article. I do apply that technique to anything I might be apprehensive about.
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